“My partner and I are leaving a studio space we’ve spent a lot of time in over our relationship - it’s charged with a lot of memories, associations, and tender feelings - and moving in to a brand new (to us) studio in a part of town we’re not very familiar with. Do you have any rituals or practices we could do to thank the space before leaving it and also to bestow blessings upon a new one?”
— Anonymous Caller
“If you have that old space empty, build almost a little sacred space in the middle, altar-like, put maybe a few objects that represent how you feel about the space, maybe write words on a piece of paper, take turns sharing a memory - “I loved this day, or that art piece you made, or this an experience we had, or wasn’t it funny when this happened.” Or even the hard parts - “I’m so glad we grew through the experiences we had in the studio in this way.” And then maybe to close, have a little mini dance party to a song. I think it’s important to remember that ritual and blessing doesn’t have to be so serious, you don’t have to light a million candles or cast a million spells, but what can you really do to shift psychic energy in a space, to feel good in it together.”
— Marlee Grace
“I’ve been noticing in this uncertain time that I’m struggling to put down my phone. The days in front me of me feel exceedingly anxiety-riddled, while also being pretty slow and sluggish. At the same time, the energy on social media is so charged, and I am now identifying my attachment to checking it to be more of an addiction than just a small distraction. It doesn’t feel good, and yet I can’t stop engaging, checking, and ultimately, feeling bad. I know you’ve talked and written about this, so I’m just wondering how you’re navigating your own social media woos as we all weather the many storms raining down currently.”
— Anonymous Caller
“I’m not trying to live a world where I don’t have any guilty pleasures, but I think something that’s been really big for me is that when you’re on a social media app - Twitter, Facebook, Instagram - you’re receiving hundreds of directives every day. You have hundreds of people saying “read my book,” “donate to this thing,” “come to this event,” “read my blog post,” “link in bio to hear my new single,” “go watch this movie,” “go read this,” “go think about this topic,” “go to this therapist,” “go look at a dog meme,” I don’t know. You know where I’m going. Go look at a dog meme, that’s enjoyable. But even if it’s joyful things, you are receiving information and direction from dozens - if not hundreds if not thousands - of people every day when you log into an app. The last few days of not even having any access to looking, has been really transformative. I feel like I get really teary-eyed a lot, my heart feels open. I’m only tuned into myself and the people around me.”
— Marlee Grace
“I’ve noticed that information about my own queerness is clearer or louder in certain parts of my menstrual cycle. During the luteal phase of the month (the week before my period), I’m really feeling my queerness. I was in a lesbian relationship before, now in a committed relationship with a cis man, we also own a business together, so I’m in this wave of unpacking what does it mean to be in touch with their sexuality. Do you have any advice? ”
— Anonymous Caller
“I think that one really amazing thing about charting your cycle is that for me, in my weeks 2 and 3 of my cycle, post bleeding, pre-luteal phase, I tend to have a lot more energy, a lot more clarity. I wonder, if you’re already tracking your cycle, if those could be times where maybe you decide to discuss things with your partner. Schedule a special picnic or walk - a time to talk. I think making it clear to your partner, I want queerness to be a part of our business. If that’s part of your politic, to publicly be like “this is a queer-owned business.” And then making that balance between how much space do you take up in a hetero-passing relationship - I still think your own queerness can be integrated into running a public space. In terms of who you fundraise for, who you work with, collaborate with, who your vendors are, who your employees are, what kind of signal you’re giving your community. ”
